Hunger

It is hard to describe the void to someone unfamiliar

The craven yearning that gnaws at my heart and keeps me up at night

Dogged by the sensation that all the blood has been drained from my body

Needing my existence proven to me by force

The desire that brings me to tears, far beyond pleasure

Whatever gets me closer to feeling safe

I will follow that urge wherever it leads me

It usually takes me upstream to a place where I cannot see feel or think

And sometimes oblivion is enough

I used to think real love would finally satisfy it

But I know better now - it is more sinister

It is more insidious

Because it is a goalpost that moves every time I reach for it

And it is not the void inside me

Instead I have become the void

A yawning chasm of ache and need

Hard to describe to those who feel full and those who feel whole

and those who feel alright

The mouth of a loose woman is a deep pit;

He with whom the Lord is angry falls into it.